For Michael and Walt

Did you guys know that they now make Batman Crocs??? They must stop this madness!!

Kathy Griffin

Hey kids tonight is the night they air the Kathy Griffin show that I was at on Bravo. I believe the time is 8 Central time...so 9 for you East coasters. I believe the show is called Kathy Griffin: Straight to Hell. :) I think there might be a very good chance that my friend Clayton and I may be on tv. We were seated on an aisle and Clayton has a really great boisterous laugh. The cameraman kept coming up next to me and crouching in the aisle and filming Clayton and I laughing. I shouldn't have worn my glasses...who knew I needed to look all cute to sit in an audience? Oh well, I guess it was slightly more important to be able to see than to look cute. (we all know that's not true--it's always more important to look cute!)

Anyway, I'll let you know if I made it on tv...and I'll be signing autographs later. ;)

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Hey everyone! Thanksgiving is tomorrow, and I want to wish everybody a happy, safe Thanksgiving! This is my favorite holiday by far. Nick and I will be driving to Mason City Iowa to have dinner with my aunt Mary Kay and cousin Liz and her husband and kids. Enjoy everyone!!

I won Christmas!

I emailed my cousin Carrie after hearing she was calling family members upset about Christmas. The email was short and sweet, only 2 sentences. "Rumor has it you are upset about Christmas and have been calling everyone. Wouldn't it make sense to call me if you are upset?" And I left my phone number.

So about 15 minutes later Carrie called. I think she realized that she looked like an ass for calling everyone in the family and not addressing it with me. She claims she was just checking around to see if everyone was "okay" with it being at our house. (yeah right) Anyway, it is at my house, not the scary death house. So that is a huge relief. I'm still probably going to have to break down and tell her we don't want to go back there, but at least I've bought time with it at my house this year.

I really don't understand how she could not already know. I mean really 25 people standing around the kitchen watching someone die is traumatic. Duh! Oh well. I am just relieved that it's settled and we have been spared the drama this year, at least. I had actually been having nightmares lately because of it. :(

My adorable Grandpa

Yesterday was my adorable Grandpa Max's 89th birthday. I can't even express what he means to me. As some of you know, I have some pretty screwed up parents, and my Grandpa truly makes me feel loved. He and my Grandma (who died of breast cancer/Alzheimer's in 1991) were always one of the only stable things in my childhood. He now lives (still independently) in northern Minnesota on a lake, and I try to go visit him a few times a year. It's funny because he takes care of me like I'm still a little girl, and it always makes me feel really special. He does cute little things like make ice cream sundaes at night, and tucks me into bed. We go to A&W drive in and eat coney dogs and root beer floats. We go hiking in the woods, or go to Itasca State park. Sometimes we just go for a drive and look at the leaves changing color. It's silly stuff, but I cherish the times we spend together.

He is the only person in the world who really, truly, unconditionally loves me. He's always proud of me regardless. He's my Papa, and I love him.

Dysfunction over Christmas

Okay this story needs a little background. A few years ago we were having Christmas dinner with my mother's side of the family at a farmhouse in rural Minnesota. I was seated directly to the left of my uncle Ben. He asked for someone to pass him the dinner rolls. Then he fell face down into his dinner. I leaned over to see what was going on, and his eyes were rolled back in his head and fluttering. He then lurched backwards. We laid him on the floor in the kitchen and checked his breathing and pulse, he had neither. My cousins began CPR. I started moving the card table that the kids were eating at so the ambulance crew could get there. We all watched my uncle Ben turn purple and die while they were still doing CPR. The ambulance finally got there after about 1/2 hour. He was pronounced dead at the hospital. They think he had a blood clot to the brain and died instantly.

Now that farmhouse has ALWAYS given me the creeps. Since I was a little girl, I always hated going there, but put up with it to try not to hurt my aunt Sue's feelings. Well, last year my aunt Sue died there in that creepy house.

I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO THAT HOUSE AGAIN!!! EVER IN MY LIFE!

My cousin Carrie (Sue's daughter) wants to have Christmas there this year. Frankly I only went there again after Ben died one time, and was completely tormented by visions of Ben turning purple and dying in that kitchen. I can't deal with going to that place. I'm not the only one, most of us feel that way, but don't know a polite way of saying we don't want to go there anymore.

I offered to have Christmas, and now I've apparently stirred the pot. (I didn't even tell her I don't want to go there anymore, I just offered to have it this year!) Carrie is calling everybody all upset, and won't address it with me.

Why are families so dysfunctional? My next move is to tell her why we don't want to come, and that will only hurt her feelings. The thing is, she grew up there and has lots of memories...we go there once a year, and the memories we have are not pleasant.

Crocs revisited

I was shopping recently and to my horror I saw that they are now marketing Crocs for winter wear as well. They are your standard ugly rubber Crocs, only now they are lined with lambswool. Really? Is there such a demand for unattractive footwear that we need to wear garden clogs year round? (Plus, I thought Uggs filled the ugly winter shoe quota, no?) I really thought one of the only redeeming grace's of winter was that I would get a small reprieve from the constant assault on my fashion sense by these hideous plastic shoes.

PEOPLE STOP BUYING THEM!! If you do, it's a win-win situation. You don't look like an idiot, and you will spare me from openly mocking you. Thanks in advance.

P.S.

Ok, so on the bright side I got my new computer up and running. It's mostly awesome! Really fast, and I love the 19" widescreen monitor. It has a few little glitches that if I were at all computer savvy I might be able to fix...but I'm not. That's what friends are for, right!?! So I'm bringing it to a friend and he is going to fix the little things for me. :) Yay!

Busy and crazy.

Hey all. Let's see...what's been going on?

I went to Chicago 2 weeks ago. It was really fun except hitting terrible traffic both coming and going. I usually make it in 5.5-6 hours. It took over 8 hours both ways. By the time I made it to Chicago, I was really tired. I managed to run a red light and almost hit a guy on a bike. Since it was a rental car, I'd have had to throw his body in the trunk and dispose of it in the lake. ;) Clayton said he would help me "get rid of the body"...that's a good friend! We went to dinner and ate and laughed. I really miss him, and am going to have to make a point of visiting him more often.

Saturday we went out for breakfast to I think it was called Ann Sathers. We had a TON of comfort food. Cinnamon rolls, egg wraps, hash browns with cheese. Yum, but it was enough to feed 4 more people. Then we went shopping and had pedicures. It was really warm, and we were both dressed way to warm in jeans and sweatshirts, so I bought a pair of flip-flops at DSW to try to cool off. I have really sensitive skin, and the flip flops wore the skin off the top of my feet. (I still have scabs now, 2 weeks later) Then we met JayT and John for dinner. Dinner was nice. The restaurant was on the river and near the theater, so it was convenient.

We went to the Kathy Griffin show, and it was hilarious! The only bad thing is it started 1/2 hour late, and it was a 10:30 show anyway...so that was a bit passed this old girl's bedtime! They were taping her stand up for a comedy special that I believe will be on Bravo, so there were cameras everywhere. Clayton has a really loud boisterous laugh and we were seated on the aisle, so the camera man kept crouching next to me and filming us laugh. It made me a little nervous, but it was fun nonetheless.

So last week my in-laws were in town. My MIL is a fairly unpleasant person. (by fairly unpleasant, read "hideous") She is quite heavy, and is a miserable human being who takes joy in making others miserable. For example, she is so fat she can't fit behind the steering wheel of a car, yet she will tell me how fat she thinks I've gotten. (At the time I drove a MINI Cooper....so really I fit into the tiniest car, she doesn't fit into ANY car!) Really, that's just rude to say. She has no manners whatsoever. This time she didn't pick on me for that, (I weigh 123lbs, how could she, really?) but did tell me my dog is fat. (He isn't any heavier than normal, he just needs a haircut!) She also told me I'm selfish for spending $350 on my GPS unit. Um, last time I checked I work for a living, and if I want to spend MY money on a GPS that's my own business. I told her that too. I said we have 6 figures in the 401(k), contribute monthly to our money market account and our private rainy day stock account, and if I want to spend that on an electronic toy for myself it's okay because I'm worth it. That somewhat shut the bitch up. She's just awful. The best part is I got to spend Friday, Saturday AND Sunday with them. Yay me-Not!

My second husband is either going to have a nice family, or be an orphan...I really don't care which. :)

So this week I've been dealing with a sick dog. Harvey our poodle mix has been sick. He has been lethargic, no appetite, can't really walk etc. I have had him into the vet for now $300 worth of tests. They are thinking he has some calcification in the discs in his back. We put him on steroids last night, and I'm hoping it helps. I accidentally overdosed him, too, so I was up most of the night keeping an eye on him. I was supposed to give him 1 pill 2 times a day, and for some reason I gave him 2 pills last night. I'm usually so good at that sort of thing, but I've has some short term memory issues since the accident. (still have a headache from it, in fact) Anyway I was going to make him drink peroxide to throw up, but I called the emergency vet and they said it should be fine, but to keep an eye on him. He was panting all night, so that made me worry, but this morning he is fine. Hope the meds work for him. It's heartbreaking to see a dog who can't really even walk. He's only 5, so he's too young for all this crap.

Ok, so there you go...that's what I've been up to.